an angel walking home after dark

My chest broke open

Felt the crack split right down the center

Splintering uneven

Lightning through white



Everything tumbled out before

I could catch it

Words and pictures and organs

And blood lying at your feet


An offering to your sacrifice, I yearned

To take away her sudden tragedy

But what could I give? What

Could she want?


I would give a rib to put

Life back in her

Every single one, pale piano keys singing

Come back, come back, come back to me


An angel walking home after dark

A sister searching sideways

Out of sight


Hollow like you I weep openly

And loudly

And the night hears us

Two souls screaming at the sky


Today and every day that follows

Will be grey, will be cold

Will be sorrow and I can only

Pray the sun will find you soon



I look back turning my head

and I see myself


on a concrete island between rapid


where white lights bled into white lights

and red blurred into red

cars swarming like shiny


on a dry summer day


their buzzing was incessant

the tires and the horns and the voices

I was a castaway in a tall city

that never loved me


and I knew then with my

parched throat and wide eyes

that these creatures would

eat me alive

and my bones would bleach

in the sun


I knew then I’d never belong

that there would never be an Amy-shaped


only silvery skyrises and

subways snaking underground

with a love I’d never


freddy 8.14.14

he unhinged each rib, prying them open

with such tenderness, scooping up my tiny

heart, a baby bird, which cooed

and cried and shivered from

a broken wing



humming as he worked

he mended and soothed and breathed life

back in as I watched, with my chest

hanging open and heavy



and I heard it,

the sweet coo and squeak

and I saw it

leaping from his hands and taking flight

and I felt it

soaring circles around my head, singing for joy

for joy, for joy, I could cry,

so I do



I’m alive, I whisper

me too, he says and I hear it in his voice

the flutter of wings inside him, and I see us then,

a pair of doves, in love with this life

and each other